musings on the detached hero or Dostoevsky's Grand Inquisitor

Underneath the detached hero, the intellectual machine, the diamond armor, lays a frailty succumbing to never-lasting love, loneliness, and despair. Emotions betray our hero, but the only evidence is hidden as scars upon his withering soul. Slipping into compassion and love is indeed an injury from which our fallen hero cannot recover. The kiss of death. He falls. He fails. He loses. Again.

Press on.

/end hiatus

Now it's India's turn to be on hiatus. For those of you just joining me, feel free to check out Pathological Wanderlust for updates from my volunteer trip to India. For those of you reading on facebook, this blog is imported from http://stilesruns.blogspot.com

In other news, I am now 2.5 months out from ACL reconstruction. Yes, yes, I know, ANOTHER surgery. If there were a way to go pro as a complicated surgical case, I would be MVP for sure.

For those of you who don't know, I named my new knee Sheldon Cooper. He's a theoretical physicist. My knee is smart. My knee has also acquired the super-power of meteorology. It can predict the weather with up to 73% accuracy!

As many times as I've had to re-learn to walk again I am sorry to say it does not get easier. It still hurts. A lot. It is just as mentally draining as it is physical; just as frustrating as it is slow. In all honesty, it seems there have been more bad days than good. Perhaps only because I am still in the thick of it but some days I want to throw my hands up for the agonizingly slow pace of it all. Some days it seems I am progressing backward, even though that is not the truth.

As difficult as it is, I am constantly reminded of and thankful for all the small accomplishments along the way. For example, last week I was finally given the "ok" to start running. As much as I wanted to bust out a 5K, I stuck to my program and walked 5 min/ran 1 min x 5.

Let me just say that running one minute hasn't felt so satisfying since the last time I re-learned to run!

With that milestone out of the way it is now time to focus on the future. I am not allowed to do karate just yet so I have some time to focus on the running. I think a reasonable goal will be to do one of the New Year's 5K runs. I won't be hitting any PRs but it will be motivating to have something to look forward to. If anyone has any good race suggestions in the Minneapolis area, let me know!

Press on.